Hello

Hello?  Are you there, it's me ...
You know ... Don't pretend you don't....
Try a bit harder to remember....
Really? ..... I see well let me remind you

Well we were always close all our lives, did everything together
Had the same friends, liked the same music.... I even lived with you.
But you changed ... Started to ignore me,  really we just fell apart..
I hated that so much... Watching you from a distance starving yourself because you thought you were to big to be loved, or partying trying to connect with people who you thought we're great influences and could make you feel better,  I saw what happened to you as a innocent child ...I felt your pain.

The lonely nights you spent drinking by yourself in hopes to forget the crazy thoughts running through your mind, when you finally pass out it was such a relief cause you were safe for one more night.

Yep, I saw all that....
Your probably wondering why I wasn't there for you...
I can explain,  I didn't know you anymore, you had become this empty shell of what you once were, the hallow ness in your eyes showed a deep void... Like everything was gone that made your soul spark.

It was hard for me to see you that way but you had to hit rock bottom on your own, so you could truly understand yourself.

Watching you hit rock bottom...... Just about killed me.... I saw the note of good bye you wrote, tears had dropped on the paper causing the words to run.... I also saw the pill bottles....it was such a shame that you felt so low that you just wanted to go to sleep and die...

I saw you at the hospital.... Waiting ... And waiting.... For a loving hand to care for you... It came from someone unexpected ... Your own mother...  Forcing you to eat cause you hadn't eaten in days..  Holding you while you cried in her lap....yeah ...

So hard to see you suffer ... But I had to do it.

I'm sorry but I'm here now, stronger and ready to hold your hand through anything .... For I am you, that part you lost I have been inside you all this time. Waiting for you to realize that I'm here, to help you, like the wizard of oz, I give you a brain to think with, a heart to love with and the courage to face the challenges of your life.

Hello are you still there?

Yes.

Red Head

Red headed, firecracker with a sparkle in her eye
Life is a ride, grab on and hold on tight.
Smiling she closes her eyes, gripping tighter through the curves and all the ups and downs.
Peeking just enough not to miss a moment.

Screaming as she free falls.....
Taking a deep breath, she laughs at the all fear she felt.
the love she has felt.  the sensitivity from people...

Sighing....she looks back seeing where she has been...
looking at her hands she lets go.

Letting go of  being who she is not.. because she believed she could never do it. Holding on to the feelings people and life had made her Leary and confused about how it could be.  So she held on to what she knew
the shy, introvert... worried about how to please people..

She is unique and weird, a bit of a tom boy... who loves video games...
Singing at the top her lungs in her car to her favorite songs.
Dancing till her feet hurt and still going strong till the last song is played.

The one who would give her last dollar to someone on the street...
The poet, the artist... the sister and mother, lover and the best friend.

She loves to breathe the fresh air, and find the old abandoned homes...
crawl among st the forest, dip her toes in a cold lakes water.

Read headed firecracker, be who you are... the world has been waiting for you.